One could argue that if you have taken offense, you’re automatically in the wrong because you are offended, but that’s a different discussion.
There are multiple opportunities to be offended these days, by so many things, and it seems we’re surrounded on all sides by folks who exist in a chronic state of offense about something or someone.
It’s human nature to be offended by things. Remember when people were offended by bad words in popular music, or a married couple on TV sleeping in the same bed, or politicians who lied or cheated on their spouses? Ah, the days of innocence.
We’re never going to be able to avoid every potential offense. Words slip, people are inconsiderate and selfish, governments and organizations make decisions that are destructive to personal preferences. That’s reality.
Offense feeds the ego and our sense of self-righteousness, and it’s addictive. One offense leads to another and another and another, and pretty soon you’re the grumpy old person hollering at passers-by to get off your lawn. And you’re miserable.
When we choose to take an offense, we hand over our personal power to the person or thing that offended us. We’re giving them control over our thoughts, feelings, and actions. Ew. Without the emotional allure to the ego, we’d never let that person or thing have any kind of power over us.
And here’s the other thing: just because we’re offended by something doesn’t mean we’re right. It just means we have a different perspective and big feelings about it. Who hasn’t been offended by something only to find out through attaining more information, or just maturity and experience, that your offense was unfounded?
This doesn’t mean you can’t, or shouldn’t, speak up when something is awry. It is possible to disagree, to hold opposing opinions, or to see things from a different perspective, without taking offense, picking sides, or going into attack mode. It’s possible. Not easy, necessarily, but possible.
