One of rare Rock Park birds has been found

To the Rock Park Curators, I think we may have located one of your rare birds three blocks due west of their new home under construction at Silver Sage RV Park. This rare bird has found a tree that provides shade to our patio and furniture. The bird answered back when we called her Gracie, but we are not real sure because of the slurring of her words, hiccups, flapping of her wings and hanging upside down on the branch, which kind of looks like she is doing the German polka. We yelled again at the bird because of her droppings on our patio furniture, and the bird told us she was not tree-broken and not in the mood for small talk.
My Dear Sirs: Could you please come and claim your bird?
Thank You.
Dave and Pat Atherton