The changing of life’s many seasons

RBC | The chill of the winter breeze is frigid this morning as I type this and I can’t help but think of the things in my life and how their natural progression revolves around the Colorado seasons. The ground is falling into a deep slumber with the stirrings of new life going on beneath the icy surface. Like bulbs planted before the first frost my life is in a state of limbo and rest as I prepare to make the hard trek above the surface and bloom into this new season. But as I keep my focus on the sun rising I can’t help but realize that my life will never be the same and while it’s supposed to be a blessing, these growing pains are painful and tender in this moment. I yearn for the warm summer nights being surrounded by the comfort of familiar faces and friends. The familiarity of knowing my job and setting out each morning with not much more thought or future gazing than what was required of the day’s tasks. A comfort taken in the known and stagnant waters. And while I know I’ll make new connections with the coming of this spring, the thought of the unknown is terrifying and slightly exhilarating. The possibilities could be endless and this pivotal moment in my life could be the catalyst to finding my greatest passion and purpose yet.

So while I am proud of the chances I took and the example I led for two little girls who call me “Mommy,” I will take this time of inward turmoil and reflection to rest and gather my thoughts. I’ve returned to one of my first loves, writing, in hopes of finding where that teenage girl was headed when she lost her way so very long ago. But not all that is familiar is the same and a childhood innocence lost and gained is the insight and tough experience of this most often cruel world…